Last night at 8:57 PM, Tamra Judge got up, got out of the table, went downstairs, opened the front door, walked into the dark... and she never came back. Or something like that.
(That was some Weapons humor, folks.)
A seismic wave has shocked the quiet town of Orange County, leaving seven conflict-prone women to pick up the pieces. It’s not the first time Tamra has run away from a cast trip with the entire cast turned against her, but this time is much more brutal, if only because she’s brought down by Gretchen Rossi and Gina Kirschenheiter. How did we get here?
The day started perfectly normal, as some of The Real Housewives of Orange County took a trolley ride to get some treats, while the others headed over to the famous Cafe du Monde. Just ahead, a trip to a voodoo queen would unleash an unshakeable chaos, one that deals a near-fatal blow to the longest-running Housewife.
Tamra has survived 15 seasons on this show by running just a bit faster than her foes, gossiping just enough to stir the pot without soiling her hands. She may be insidious, but you’ll never quite prove it in a court of law. And these women know that. They’ve dealt long and hard with Tamra, and they’re learning that the best path forward is through the court of public opinion.
So, they entered the season armed and ready. Shannon and Jenn made a pact they’ll both deny to go after Tamra, with Shannon begging Jenn not to “roll on her, while Gretchen answered a desperate bat-signal from Katie and Jenn.
As for Gina and Emily, well, they’ll go where the wind blows. When the tides turned against Katie, so did they, and now that it’s revealed that was all a decoy for the true takedown, they’ll fall in line. That’s how we got here, and every moment in tonight’s episode just cements what’s already in place.
Of course, this is the decoy for the true true takedown, but that’s months away.
“We are the ones that allowed Tamra to keep acting like this. And until we have an intervention, or an exorcism, or whatever you wanna call it, she’s never going to change,” Jenn declares, setting the stage for a triumphant takedown 18 years in the making—one that, unfortunately for her foes, will surely only make Tamra stronger. She’s absorbed all that voodoo, and she’ll return scarier than ever.
The ladies arrive at Bloody Mary’s Haunted Museum, where the Good Christian Belles find themselves utterly disturbed by the spirits around them. “It’s like inviting the devil in,” Tamra says, wondering why the voodoo queen would invite her friend without first checking with Tamra.
Gretchen storms out of the seminar, followed by Tamra and Shannon. Little do they know, the voodoo queen is about to baptize the remaining ladies in good spirits, protecting them from the vicious fallout just moments away. This is where it all starts to fall apart.
Here, Tamra shares some shocking information that calls all the way back to Season 4’s “Naked Wasted,” an event where Tamra and Vicki attempted to get Gretchen so drunk she’d expose her true self, while Tamra’s son made predatorial moves on her. To think people act as though Bravo only recently got dark and disturbing.
Tamra claims that Katie’s been telling bloggers she roofied Gretchen that night. Initially, Gretchen and Shannon side with Tamra’s version of events. Tamra immediately turns this into an attempt to start fresh with Gretchen, while turning the tides against Katie.
Shannon so eagerly slops this story up, growing furious at Katie—and that’s how Tamra does it. Now, Shannon’s ready to confront Katie in an explosive confrontation, while Tamra can sit back and watch with Gretchen by her side. Only, when she turns and looks, Gretchen’s nowhere to be found. Uh oh.
From here, it turns into a game of “Who do you trust the least?”.
I wouldn’t call Gretchen an expert strategist, but she plays the whole situation surprisingly well. She plays it how Tamra would, even. To Tamra’s face, Gretchen is all smiles and rainbows, knowing full-well she’s going to turn around and side with Katie. Gretchen goes to Katie and Jenn before the big dinner, giving all three a chance to scheme. Meanwhile, Tamra tells the other girls that she and Gretchen had a heart-to-heart earlier. To be this outplayed… humiliating and degrading.
It’s all presented with a creepy score, set up piece-by-piece for an explosive showdown as though it’s a murder mystery. What makes it all the more interesting is how unexplosive that showdown actually is. Sometimes, it’s all in the subtext.
After all, this is the fallout we were robbed of when Tamra was fired before Season 15, having lost her just as her comeuppance was set to take center stage. We’ve spent the past two-and-a-half seasons building back up to this moment, and it’s so exciting to see it through.
Disarmed and drunk, Tamra is viscerally unaware of what’s to come when the trio of terror sit at the table. Immediately, she pulls Gretchen aside to be a girl’s girl, asking how they should handle the Katie dilemma.
When Tamra asks if Gretchen believes Katie, she replies yes, and the score drops like a tumultuous bout of thunder. No one believes Tamra, not even herself.
So, she returns to the table with steam running out her ears, but it’s Shannon who truly hits her boiling point. It’s a really funny moment, in large part because Katie’s so unbothered as Shannon’s voice hits decibels previously thought impossible. Obviously, she’s valid to dislike Katie, and Katie lies all the time, but hey, as Camille Grammer once said, the person that remains in control is the one that wins. Sorry Shannon, you lose.
“Who wants to be around someone who hurts an entire table of people!?” Shannon exclaims, accidentally burying Tamra just a bit before the girls truly toss her in the grave.
Confused by the change-up, Tamra redirects the conversation to Gretchen and her two faces. But Jenn sidesteps that pivot, jumping right back to the “fatty photo” that’s sweeping the county. Jenn goes one step further, insinuating that Tamra’s on xanax, which Tamra responds to by slurring her words and telling everyone at the table to shut the f--- up. See, could she really do all that on a downer?
And here comes the final blow from the OG of the OC, Gina Kirschenheiter.
“You’re being f---ing rude to everyone at the table, Tamra. This is actually my table, and I don’t appreciate that,” she scolds Tamra.
“It’s not fun to be in the middle of all of your bullshit,” she adds, before Heather gives the true knock-out punch, co-signing Gina’s statement and then offering Gretchen her gumbo. What a betrayal. It’s made even more embarrassing when Shannon gets to deliver some confessionals about Tamra’s supposed drinking problem. Tamra storms out of the table, yells at Heather, and then demands production call her a car lest she have to order some stupid Uber. This truly is the most haunting series of events in Tamra Judge history.
And finally, it’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for since the cryptic scandal broke earlier this year. Tamra texts Heather, “I’m out. Gina crossed the line. No one is authentic,” shoots Gina a “F--- OFF!!!” and posts an Instagram story announcing she’s quit the show.
And that was the last we ever saw of Tamra Judge…
…you wish.
